As a young person I still envisioned having a life that was really centered around myself and me only, doing what I want and having it all for myself. So what was it about Blue Star, a community-based organization, that pulled me?
I remember being five-years-old and watching Blue Star members walking into our house for weekly Satsang (kirtan and meditation in a group setting) and thinking to myself, why can't we just be normal and go to church or the temple? Why did we have to be different? I had no idea at that time that "different" would be exactly the definition of my life and what is to come.
1996 - Founder of Blue Star, Guruji Sri Vasudeva, my mom Meerabai, sister Shreya, myself in Sailor Moon of course, and dad Azad.
I guess one could say that Blue Star was always a part of my "DNA". My parents were always dedicated to serving the organization in any way they could, being in Canada, and although my mom says that we kids had the choice if we wanted to participate, naturally, we gravitated to what was around us.
Although for a young person, it didn't come without questions. I felt strange that we had weekly gatherings in our home, and that our basement was transformed into a weekly get-together hall. The master bedroom was dedicated for when Guruji Sri Vasudeva would come to visit, yet I still didn't feel inspired.
Blue Star was founded by spiritual guide Sri Vasudeva in 1988 after an intensive period in his early life of searching for a true Guru and a disciplined period of self-transformation. The website reads, "Blue Star is dedicated to the development of human potential at all levels – physical, mental, emotional, intellectual, social and spiritual. Our programs are focused on self realization, optimal well-being, community service and co-creating a more compassionate/peaceful world."
The vision sounds amazing, but it still didn't resonate with me at that time. I didn't connect with the community members and as a young person I still envisioned having a life that was really centered around myself and me only, doing what I want and having it all for myself. So how was it that Blue Star pulled me? It was through my relationship with Sri Vasudeva.
In 2005, he came to visit Blue Star Canada, for their yearly retreat. He was staying with us in our home for a few of the days of his visit and we had a chance to "be" in the same space. I was unapologetically myself, but as they say, "when the student is ready, the master will appear." Guruji found ways to bond with me, through simple conversations about school or even watching sports on TV with me, but it was during a chanting session where I felt a connection to the Divine that sparked an interest inside of me. There was a different feeling in my heart, and I wanted to hold on to it for dear life.
This feeling of connection grew within me so much that I decided that I wanted to go to Trinidad to visit the Blue Star ashram by myself for the entire summer. I enjoyed the space of the center, although I was the youngest visitor there at that time, and always felt that when I came back to Canada, I was armed with something different inside of me that would help me to manage life. In fact I loved it so much, that I would spend every summer there, enjoying the yearly August retreats lead by Guruji, the youth camp, and the celebration of Guruji's birthday.
While at the ashram, I was trained on helping to film the programs, and this is what lead me to choose journalism & broadcasting as a first degree. I would fly in to the ashram to help film programs there-in after, and in 2013, my life completely changed.
There was an opening in the Blue Star audio-visual department, for a support person which would eventually lead to manager. I had just finished my exams in Canada and thought that I would be returning to find work and start "that life." But, I decided to take a leap of faith and live in the ashram, permanently. My life would never be the same, and at this point, I wouldn't have done it any differently.
Being in the audio-visual department showed me how much the messages of inner growth impacted the world, and being able to capture Guruji felt like an honour that I couldn't describe. The reverence for being able to live around such a Being and learn everything I could, outlasted any feelings of missing "that life."
Eventually I also got into the practice of yoga and my world opened up even more, being able to use my skills in journalism and broadcasting in combination with teaching yoga.
I grew to really love living in the ashram, recognizing that no where else in this world could give me what I feel when I am there, a chance to connect deep inside of myself, whilst doing what I love.
The path isn't always easy and I'll share more about my ups and downs in my future posts, but living at the Blue Star Ashram, was the best decision I've ever made and has given me my very best life at this point.
Guruji Sri Vasudeva & Sridevi (Circa 1994)
Thank you for sharing in this part of my journey! Please feel free to let me know your thoughts and what brought you to the ashram, or a life of spirituality, below!
Add comment
Comments